Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
