I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
