Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
grandma shit on top of the toilet
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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