I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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