you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Randomize