ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
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Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
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its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.