What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
