i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Randomize
