we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
