i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
When did we convert life to cartoon?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
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