so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
