His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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