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• (248): View more from Michigan

  the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.

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• (585): View more from New York

  He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.

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• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (760): View more from California

  He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.

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• (912): View more from Georgia

  I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not

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• (432): View more from Texas

  They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!

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• (914): View more from New York

  So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack

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• (917): View more from New York City

  I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.

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