Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  we need a boat to join in

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!! (1-248): we need a boat to join in (248): Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva http://tfl.nu/6n2t
  Replies (3) Good night (1294) Bad night (562)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  but fathers day is next sunday

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day (617): but fathers day is next sunday (781): i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet http://tfl.nu/pxvx
  Replies (14) Good night (939) Bad night (4348)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america. http://tfl.nu/loag
  Replies (7) Good night (4216) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Toronto

  you alive?

  (1-905): View more from Toronto

  ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): you alive? (1-905): ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin http://tfl.nu/15wq
  Replies (17) Good night (3404) Bad night (623)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine. http://tfl.nu/pias
  Replies (11) Good night (4759) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...

  (775): View more from Nevada

  yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me... (775): yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift. http://tfl.nu/mwdt
  Replies (25) Good night (5599) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished. http://tfl.nu/vhfi
  Replies (4) Good night (3584) Bad night (906)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night. http://tfl.nu/m1vr
  Replies (6) Good night (3460) Bad night (1100)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing. http://tfl.nu/n1s5
  Replies (4) Good night (3149) Bad night (660)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame http://tfl.nu/dqi5
  Replies (2) Good night (1765) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP http://tfl.nu/mtep
  Replies (6) Good night (1331) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike. http://tfl.nu/7q3x
  Replies (2) Good night (1104) Bad night (602)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing http://tfl.nu/0z5g
  Replies (9) Good night (850) Bad night (509)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun. http://tfl.nu/8d32
  Replies (0) Good night (435) Bad night (287)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors http://tfl.nu/gwrw
  Replies (0) Good night (435) Bad night (295)

Randomize