or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
