dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize