I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
