weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize