my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
