Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize