I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
