I never want to see another naked old woman again.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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