ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
