Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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