Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
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I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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