Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
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