Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail