I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
