i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
What did we do last night that was yellow?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
