I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
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