it wasn't lemon gatorade
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
