No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
This is my gift to your gina
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize