i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize