Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
