would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
its liver damage thursday
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
