Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
