Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize
