***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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