so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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