I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize