Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize