Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
