omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
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I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
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I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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