dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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