you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
