It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
