Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
