STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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