i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize