Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
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she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
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So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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