He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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